Posted on February 10, 2016 by New Jersey Bride
As you plan your wedding, you’ll be faced with so many decisions. But don’t let the planning get carried away.
Here are 8 wedding choices you’ll regret forever, so please, please avoid them!
1. Having the wedding your parents want. You’re an adult. You’re getting married. And while you want to appease your parents and make them proud, this is YOUR wedding and you should make it the event YOU want it to be—not the one your parents want to show off to their friends or business acquaintances. Of course you can compromise to make everyone happy, but don’t get married in a ballroom if you’ve always dreamed of a beach wedding.
2. Spending money you don’t have. We can’t emphasize how important this topic is. Trust us—DO NOT spend money you don’t have. Your wedding is about your love and bringing friends and family together to celebrate your union. It is NOT about the 15-piece band, the $20,000 designer wedding gown or the $400 per-plate reception location. Some of the loveliest weddings we’ve seen have been the most simple events, heavy on the love not on the “stuff.” You should be investing in your future together, including a house and a family—not taking years to pay off the debt from your wedding.
3. Having “X” because all of your friends have had it. With each year comes a number of popular wedding trends—photo booths, cigar rollers, food trucks, wearing two gowns, after-party lounges, etc.—and while these are all really fun, DO NOT feel like you need to have a certain details just because it’s the hot item or your friends have had it. Everything costs money, and your wedding should be a reflection of you, not your friends. So include details that are important and meaningful to you. It doesn’t matter what everyone else has. There are no “must haves.”
4. Not inviting the right people. Because weddings have become such a huge event, there’s often the pressure to add every family member, every classmate since preschool, every college fraternity brother, every neighbor in your condo building and every acquaintance at work to your guest list. But the numbers add up and before you know it, your target number of 150 is suddenly approaching 300. If you have a huge family with hundreds of cousins, it’s OK to only invite the ones closest to you—the ones who actually know the person you’re marrying. The same goes for work acquaintances. While most people feel obliged to invite their boss along with one or two close friends, there is absolutely no assumption that your entire department will be receiving invitations (that’s why you may want to be on the down-low when discussing wedding plans at work). You need to ask yourself if you anticipate having these people still in your lives in ten years. Those longtime friends and close family members are who you should be surrounding yourself with on your wedding day—and the ones you’ll want to look at in the photo album for the rest of your life.
5. Trying to DIY everything yourself. Unless you’re a professional baker, please don’t try to make the cake the day before your wedding. The same goes for your dress, flowers and food. And as for the favors, escort cards, invitations, wedding programs, reception décor and what seem like other simple details, what may seem like a small project six months before your event, can snowball and turn into a massive undertaking, where you’re staying up all night for a week in order to get it done. Or at the last minute after the project goes awry, you’re spending three times what you would have in order ship the backup idea in on time for the wedding. DIY is a lot like eating—your eyes may be bigger than your stomach. So we recommend picking just one or two small projects that you know you can master and be super successful with. The important items are truly best left for the professionals.
6. Not investing in a quality photographer. We know the temptation is real to go with disposable cameras, a cousin who’s majoring in photography or an Instagram hashtag collecting all your friends images, but this will be a HUGE regret! This is one of those categories where you truly get what you pay for. An experienced, quality photographer will not only capture all the images you want, but also be professional, know the proper lighting, understand how to compose a picture and actually help with your timeline of the day and move things along smoothly for you. These images are far too important to leave to someone less experienced. If the amateur photographer misses a shot—or shots—there are no retakes. And trust us, you will be devastated. We highly recommend spending as much as your budget allows on a professional photographer. See some of our favorites here.
7. Ordering a smaller size gown with the hope of losing weight. DO NOT do this! You can always have your dress taken in a few weeks before your wedding, but you do not want to be needing to lose weight at the last minute in order to fit into your dress. This is the last thing you need to be worried about right before your wedding. It doesn’t matter what size dress you’re wearing. What matters is that you’re comfortable, because that’s when you’ll look your prettiest.
8. Making the event more important than the person you’re marrying. We see so many brides who are so obsessively focused on the day itself, that they forget why they’re doing this in the first place. The wedding is not about the favors, the color of the bridesmaid dresses, the signature cocktail or the flavor of your cake. It’s about marrying the love of your life. And at the end of the day, none of the details really matter. The wedding day will come and go, but your love will be with you forever.
