Planning a wedding can be hard… like, really, really hard. When was the last time that you planned a party that was this big and this important!? Well, to help ease your mind during those moments when having a wedding seems entirely too overwhelming (and you and your fiance just want to go to Vegas and elope), we’ve compiled some of the best wedding advice from real New Jersey brides.

And don’t forget the most important thing: it’s all about the LOVE!

Drew: It’s important to be realistic and let go of some expectations or images of the ‘perfect wedding’ you have in your head—or your Pinterest board.

Gabrielle: Be a little selfish! Throughout the wedding planning process, I was often worried about pleasing other people. But at the end of the day it is your wedding so do what will make you and your soon-to-be-husband happy! I would also recommend having at least one year to plan. I had less than eight months because I wanted a fall wedding, but a few more months to plan would have definitely helped!

Heather:  Try not to let the small things bother you. This is easier said than done, but once the day gets here it will be perfect…and it will be over before you know it!

Kayley: Take moments throughout the night to savor the details. How things look, feel, etc.

Andrea: Stay organized, get things done early (even the little details) and make sure to take some time for yourself in the weeks leading up to the big day so that you are able to feel calm and relaxed.

Jennifer: Enjoy every moment. Take it all in. Don’t worry about the little stuff because any hiccup that does happen, no one will notice but you. I remember worrying about the little “issues” that happened during my wedding and no one–not even my husband–even realized. The day will go so quickly and it will all feel like a dream. You are a bride for just this one moment, so sit back back and enjoy every minute.

Laura: Try to take it all in as it’s happening. The day REALLY does fly by like a magical whirlwind. Take it all in with your husband as you are sitting at the sweetheart table and give each other a high-five for putting it all together.

Toni: Explore and be hands-on! Try DIY activities with the future hubby, family and friends. It makes for great bonding, and seeing your collaborative hard work in one fabulous party is very fulfilling!

Sarah: Plan a wedding that captures who you are as a couple! Don’t sweat the small stuff, and make sure you aren’t afraid to ask your vendors questions!

Cherilyn: My advice for other brides is to always take time to reflect on why you are going through the planning process. It is stressful and time consuming, but you are doing it because you have found someone that you want to spend the rest of your life with. If after every time you are stressed you remember that piece of advice, I can promise you it will make you feel better!

Kelly: Remember to soak in the moment. Really look around at everyone in attendance and think about how much they mean to you. It will probably be the only time that all of those people are in the same room. Take in how much you love your significant other and how amazing you feel at that very moment. Don’t let the minute details of planning a wedding get in the way of the most special day of your life.

Sheena: Enjoy every precious moment of the wedding planning process and the day of the wedding. It will be a memory you will cherish forever. It is a lot of work but it is so worth it. Hold your friends and family close because they will be the ones to get you through all the hiccups that will happen. Keep in mind that your wedding is about family–the family you have, the family you are joining and the new family you will be creating.

Danielle: Be as present as you can throughout the day. It goes by so fast you have to consciously appreciate every minute!  Also, take some quiet time alone to process the day ahead before you start to get ready. I went on a walk by myself in the morning and it was so calming and special. Take time to reflect, think and get excited!

Laurel: Try on different wedding dress styles even if they aren’t what you are looking for. You never know! Most importantly, this is your fiance’s and your wedding. Family, friends and guests will have their opinions and may even try to make demands, but always remember that they are there to witness your happiness. Taking them into consideration is a beautiful and respectful thing to do, but don’t worry if you can’t accommodate everyone’s requests. They will be happy to be a part of your day no matter what.

Brooke: If you’re on the fence about doing a first look, definitely do it! The first look was a great moment that put us at ease for the rest of the day. It also allowed us to get amazing photos of just the two of us before the ceremony so we weren’t rushed for photos during the gap between the ceremony and cocktail hour. Another piece of advice: hire a honeymoon planner. After planning a wedding, the last thing we wanted to do was coordinate a big trip. We worked with Katie at Ever After Honeymoons and she was fabulous. We were deciding whether we wanted to go to Greece or Italy, and with her expert planning, she was able to make both happen for us. Also, if we had any issues or questions throughout our honeymoon she was available 24/7 to assist us.

Alexandra: Stay close during the process and lean on each other for support. Girls, don’t assume your husband doesn’t care about wedding planning. Guys, don’t assume your girl doesn’t need any help! You’re her life partner and this is the biggest day of your lives so far…she needs you! My husband and I went to every single appointment, tasting and fitting together (besides my dress.) I am so thankful to have a husband that was excited to be involved. I could have never done it without him. He is my best friend!